NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR

Monday, February 15th at 8:00 p.m.

It's MONDO MONDAYS at The Loft, celebrating weird, wild and wonderful flicks from the Mondo side of the silver screen! Admission is only $2.00, and don't forget to check out our yummy "Mondo Munchies" snack bucket ... fill a cup for a buck!

"This is one big hunk of 80s cheesecake ... watching this movie from start to finish will make you dumber. I'm not joking. You have been warned." - MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD MOVIES

What do you get when you combine three crappy movies into one? You get NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR, that's what!
In the grand tradition of TALES FROM THE CRYPT and TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE (minus the quality), this is a schlocky horror anthology loosely tied together by ridiculous framing segments featuring God and Satan on a train haggling over the souls of characters in the stories. Along for the ride, for some reason, is what we're told is a "rock band," singing one rockin' pop tune called, "Dance With Me," accompanied by some pretty hot breakdancing. Oh yeah, and the souls of the musicians are to be divied up also, but based on their bland singing, it's pretty apparent they have no "soul" to begin with.
The trio of stories we are presented with (each one representing an older feature-length film edited down to about 20 minutes in length) make about as much sense as the train sequences, so anyone looking for narrative logic should jump off this train at the first stop.
"The Case of Harry Billings" tells of a poor jerk drugged up and hypnotized into luring unsuspecting victims to a hospital where their organs are forcibly harvested and sold to medical schools across the globe. "The Case of Gretta Connors" is a love story involving a death cult inventing ever more complex forms of Russian Roulette at which to cackle maniacally. And last, and certainly longest, is "The Case of Claire Hansen," pitting the devout Claire against the son of Satan, whose heart she must remove and place in a wooden box made from the actual Cross.
Incredibly absurd, totally incoherent and very splattery (with some weird stop motion animation thrown in for good measure), NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR will make you feel like you're on a drug trip, without all the potential side effects.